Another Year, Another DFest

I just want to brag about my husband.  He is Executive Event Director for a local music conference and festival.   I'm very proud of him.  Not only is he incredible at what he does, but he loves it.  I feel blessed that he has the opportunity to thrive in his job.   Now, this is all despite the fact that I feel like a single mom every year in July... he's a busy man when Dfest approaches. Jude will go a good 4 or 5 days around dfest without seeing Ben... and it's during this time that I realize how much I depend on him for help.  I have a great husband.  He is an immense help everyday.   He gets up with Jude and lets me sleep a little longer (the best gift you could give me).  He gives Jude his baths.  He plays with him.  I don't understand how single mothers do it, and I really don't understand how married women (who don't have helpful husbands) do it alone.   That would drive me crazy.  So, I just wanted to say how blessed I am, and how proud I am of my husband, and how ready I am for things to return to normalcy... aka, sleeping in.

Separation Anxiety

I thought we were through with this whole separation anxiety thing. He got over it fairly early in his short little life. And then we changed classes at church. Now, I drop him off and he cries like I'm abandoning him for life, and his heart is now broken. I try to make it as least drawn out as I can. I hug, I say goodbye, I'll be back, I wave and I'm gone. Now, I have to say, at least he can now stay in class the whole service. I no longer see the dreaded number come up on the screen during service, as I try to subtly and quietly get up and leave. He's made progress. But, inevitably, when I go in to get him at the end of service, he's sobbing again, a look of betrayal in his eyes. Some of the other children's mothers have already come...where were you? And then, for a good couple of minutes, he's still crying/whimpering. Why does it take so long for him to calm down? You would think he would see me, and Bam! all good. It's like he's at the top of a roller coaster of tears and he can't stop until after he's reached the bottom of the proverbial hill. I can't really blame the kid. I'm a stay-at-home mom; this is the only time I leave him with people he doesn't know. What do I expect? Especially when I waited until he was 6 months to leave him in the nursery at all. I dug this hole of anxiety myself. Now I must lie in it.

Why?

Why are children so fascinated with poop? And it's not a learned fascination either...it must be intrinsic, because it begins so young. For instance, my darling son Jude decided to take off his diaper, while his naive mother thinks he's actually taking a nap (side issue: why are disposable diapers so easy for kids to take off? Couldn't they have put like a sailor's knot on it to keep them out? I guess that's what I get for going the "easy" route with disposable diapers). Then he proceeds to poop all over his crib; I'm talking like 4 different piles of excrement. And this is when he decides it's time for a sleep, so he sleeps. On his poop. When I hear him wake up, noticeably early from his nap, I hear him saying, "Poo Poo"...and that's when I see the smeared poop all over the crib, and him. I'm talking caked into his hair. What gets me is that I don't think it was the poop that woke him up; I believe it was because he peed on top of it all. And, of course, he can't sleep in his own pee. That's just gross.

Unexpected Visit

So, Ben, Jude and I just got back from Niagara Falls, Canada, where Ben is from. This was an unexpected visit; Ben's grandmother passed away. She was 97 years old, and had lived a long, fulfilled life, so it wasn't a tragic passing. But a funeral is a funeral. We wanted to be a support an encouragement to his mom. We were happy to be there with family...Ben's sister and her family came up too. Jude's cousin, Calla, is 6 weeks younger than he is, and so precious. They live in Virginia, so we don't get to see them often.
Upon realizing that we would be flying, a subtle panic set in. We have only flown once with Jude, in April. It went fine, but I'm slightly ashamed to admit, Benadryl may have been the reason. I'm not sure what causes the apprehension, whether it's the enclosed space with a toddler or the idea of multiple strangers blaming me with their eyes when he starts to cry, or the exhaustion of trying to keep Jude busy and entertained in my lap for hours at a time. On our way to Canada, my fears were realized when he went the whole day without sleep, which he has never done. He just wouldn't do it. We tried Benadryl (again, not proud), we tried lulling him to sleep with Elmo's World, reading...nothing worked. He fought it all. He wanted to kick the seat in front of him, and touch the man's head, and turn on and off the overhead lights. But his refusal to sleep and fussiness was expounded, I know, by my lingering, splitting headache. Maybe he could sense my annoyance. At any rate, we got there safely. I'm not complaining; it's all relative. Jude's fussiness may be perfect behavior in another child. He's a great kid, and I'm blessed. I guess I realized that it's not some magical equation that makes it go smoothly. It's a lot of work on the parent's part, maybe some good timing, and some entertaining supplies.
On the way home, he was an angel. He actually slept (no Benadryl - isn't it true it sometimes has the opposite affect?). And we are so happy to get back on schedule. He really does great on trips; he's very adaptable, but I love coming home to normalcy.
This was the first time with my husband's family that Jude was putting names to everyone. He loves saying Calla's name. And they are at a kissing stage. Everyone's oohs and ahs encourage repetitive kissing and hugging. At one point, we actually pulled them away, pointing out that they are blood relatives, and there is a limit. They are so sweet.
All in all, this trip was a great family time, although I wish it was under different circumstances. Ben and I are blessed with supportive and loving family on both sides.
And, I think I overcame some of my toddler flying anxiety. a little.